At Semester's End

There is something I hate.

It is that feeling at the end.

You want it to be over so badly, but you must endure.

The last push to the finish line.

I've been studying for some 8 hours.

And will do at least as much tomorrow.

The worst part is that it's all for just one class.

In the meantime, I've rediscovered Kasabian.

And found a great new Firefox extension, FoxyTunes.

Observe:

----------------
Now playing: Kasabian - Reason Is Treason
via FoxyTunes

Census

Not the over-reaching, unconstitutional kind we'll all be forced by our overgrown government to participate in next year, just curious who reads this. So if you don't mind leaving a quick comment I would appreciate it.

And don't worry, I won't even threaten to jail you if you opt out.

Awake

...is not a word that should ever describe a three year old at 2300 hours. Nevertheless it does mine. He wants to sleep in my bed because Mommy's at work. When he sleeps in my bed however, no matter the distance between us initially, he invariably rolls over and proceeds to kick me in his sleep. He inherited that trait from his mother.

Often when he doesn't want to go to bed I will strike a bargain with him; if you lay quietly for ten minutes and don't fall asleep you can have the drink of water you've been asking for, for example. Well he just tried a bargain of his own: I lay down two minutes and if I'm still awake I can get in your bed! So I countered: You lay down and when you fall asleep if your still awake then you can get in my bed. He thought that was a great idea, and I haven't heard a peep since.

And Another V

I'Ve been worried for some time now. The kind of worry that you bury deep down and don't think about, under the premise that it will just stop. Then something sparks a memory and it drowns you again...

Some two years ago the In-Laws introduced me to the greatest teleVision program of all time: Lost. I became obsessed. I don't watch much TV, but when the right show comes along I tend to View it Voraciously with a Vim and Vigor I can't Very well eVade. I become Voracious in appetite and ViVacious in fan hood, Visiting Virtual Vestiges of Veneration and Vesting in Various Volitionary actiVities indicatiVe of my Vehemence.

So to what do I owe my worry? The next season of Lost is the last, and I haVe had nothing to replace it with when it's oVer.

Until now.

This week was the Virgin Voyage of a new Vessel Vying for my Virulent deVotion, Vis-aVis:

V

V

Remember, remember, the 5th of November
The Gunpowder Treason and Plot;
I can think of no reason the Gunpowder Treason
Should ever be forgot.

A revolution without dancing is a revolution not worth having.

coming to you like a rope in a chain store

I like to make stuff. I can't draw but I love to take pictures. Not of people though. At least not when they're posing. That turns it into a chore. I like to create songs. It's one of my favorite pass time activities. I do wish I could remember all the songs I've made up over the years. Like that one that came to me in a dream so clearly that I awoke at 2 AM and started playing it with barely a thought. That song was mega awesome, but doomed to be nothing but a sleepy time memory. I tell Mogli stories at night. Often they are about my grandfather's many and varied adventures. About equally as often they are completely fabricated, usually loosely based on a subject or concept he chooses and I expand upon as I kneel bedside. I know it's a success if there are no off topic side notes. Actually I usually know before it gets to that point. From time to time I'll think I'm doing something great with the chosen material, a spaceman who rather unexpectedly and inexplicably meets a bear fishing for example, only to be unexpectedly and inexplicably interupted with a question about why no one else's race car is as fast as his.

I'm going to write a book.

Prog's That Way

The new Muse album came out this week. I bought it on day one, of course. Having heard it before hand on their web site, I knew that I liked it. I also knew that there are some very proggy moments that make me say "huh?" Yes, it's true that they drew a great deal of inspiration from Queen for the music and George Orwell's 1984 for the lyrics. It's also true though that it is refreshingly original, politically poignant, and, in a word, terrific.

Since it's release two days ago it's pretty much all I've listened to. That and Glenn Beck. Imagine my delight when the latter used a half hour of his show time talking about one of his favorite bands: Muse. He even played a track, United States of Eurasia, which I have previously mentioned. He talked about the Libertarian nature of the lyrics and how perfectly in touch they are, the great music, and the amazing creativity behind it. At the end of the break he encouraged everyone to buy it. After the commercial he informed us that Muse's legal representation had just contacted him asking him to retract his endorsement, which I think is hilarious. Update: As it turns out they didn't really call Glenn, it was just a poorly delivered joke. Either way though, it's a funny thought.

I confess the chorus of "The Resistance" is still a little too much for me, but otherwise I am in love with the album, especially "Undisclosed Desires," where they decided to get all hip hop. My favorite moment on the album though has to be the last 30 seconds of "Unnatural Selection" when they kick it in to gear and rock like they mean it. To quote Glenn, it's "brilliant."

CFR 2K9

This is a story. I met Mrs Candid in May. We became serious rather quickly, attending one another's family functions and so forth within weeks. Her mother's family gets together the first Sunday of each month for dinner. They also have a family reunion every year over Labor Day weekend. July and August of that first year it seemed to me that was all they talked about. By the time the reunion came around we had only been dating for just over 3 months, I didn't feel very comfortable yet even at the monthly dinner, and was quite intimidated by the thought of attending this reunion, so I didn't go. You would have thought I'd done something truly horrendous, like murdered the family dog.

I cannot express in writ what a big deal this weekend is. Family members who may as well be complete strangers the rest of the year all converge on this summer cow pasture in south west Wyoming, just like they have done for some 20 years. The trailers, tents, and tables are always in the same places; the meals are always the same; the activities don't change by any significant degree. Violation of any of these traditions is not taken lightly, punished by all but disowning the perpetrator. Like Christmas, the moment it ends the countdown to next year begins. This event is not to be taken lightly!

Fortunately I somehow managed to earn forgiveness for my truancy, and we were married the subsequent March. Leading up to the next reunion though I still had some misgivings.A candid conversation with my father-in-law one evening eased my concerns a great deal, and I went into my Labor Day adventure with only a little apprehension left. Still though, I couldn't understand why it was such a big deal to camp for a few days in an old cow pasture.

Then I got there.

A little background now. The reunion happens in a field that a great uncle leases for his cows, adjacent to the old family home and property built and developed under the homestead act around the turn of the century by Great Grandpa. It was lost in the early 30's due to financial troubles. It is also less than 15 miles from a youth camp where my family used to do reunions and many of my fondest childhood memories were made. In fact, it feels almost like it was more than a coincidence that we went somewhere so close.

I cannot express in writ how great this weekend is. My first experience was indeed overwhelming, but at the same time fantastic. I learned the history, went with Mogli on a few bear hunts, threw rocks in the river, and just relaxed. This year was even better. I was working up there anyhow, so I got there quite early, one of the first to arrive. I went with Grandpa and Grandma to a dinner where I saw an old friend who lives up that way. I even got a special historic tour of the region. The weekend passed quite quickly, but we found time to go to a nearby lake where my family always went when we were up there, but hers didn't even know about. I found a three point white tail shed. Stayed up to all hours of the morning and played my first ever complete game of Phase 10 (I've previously never made it passed Phase 5 before people got bored). Caught frogs and chased squirrels with Mogli and a couple cousins. Made a little ground figuring out who everyone is (I have no hope of ever really getting it straight). And of course went on a few bear hunts and threw LOTS of rocks in the river!

As I was packing things up to head home I was making a list of what to bring next year, and yes, beginning to count the days until next year.

I still don't, and likely never will, fully comprehend what makes this reunion such an extraordinary ordeal to the In-Law family, but I will say that I look forward to it almost as much as they do.

Almost.

Wish You Were Here

The Pink Floyd one, not the Incubus one. I really like that song. I think every band I've ever liked in the history of music has covered it. And why not? It's a great tune.

Mrs Candid, RN

That's right folks, she is finished! Graduation was a week ago, and the party a couple of days later. It's been a long and difficult couple years, evidence that she is a much better person than I (as though any evidence was necessary). So my wife, Mrs. Nightingale herself, will soon be taking care of patients and doing all the nursey things that make me feel a little queasy. Yet more of the aforementioned unnecessary evidence.

Congratulations Honey. I'm really proud of you. I love you.

US of E

As I mentioned the other day, I have been desperately searching for something new on the music front of late. Seemingly as a response Muse has released two singles for the upcoming album "The Resistance." Not only is it delightfully refreshing musically, but it's all "take the power back" and "shoot down the black helicopters" in a way only Muse can pull off. The radio single, "Uprising," is not exactly groundbreaking for them, but it's a solid tune none the less, and I can't get enough of it. Just today I heard the other single they've released on their website's media player. "United States of Eurasia" is everything the title suggests as far as paranoia and conspiracy. It's like Coast to Coast AM set to a hybrid between Queen and the "Pride and Prejudice" soundtrack. I know, it's hard to imagine, but if you can find it or care to join the Muse fan club I insist you check it out.

P.S. Here's a picture from the first time I saw them. It was in 2004 on the side stage at The Venue. There were like 200 people there. It was amazing.

Night Driving

One of the simplest pleasures of life. I used to do it when I was mad. I used to do it when I was depressed. I used to do it when I was happy, excited, or just wanted to think. Still one of my favorite scenes is the spread of city lights before me. Music takes on a whole new quality when it is the soundtrack to a night drive. Some night drives of particular significance:

• The trip to Zak's cabin. We listened to Coldplay and Radiohead. It was the last time we were all together before adult life began to take hold. I look at it as a major transition.
  
• A weekend with two night drives: one with and one without a certain girlfriend. I realized how much happier I was without her, and asserted my freedom from her grasp shortly thereafter.
  
• Crossing through the desert with my brother. He likely doesn't remember it, but it was one of the major events that turned us from brothers to friends in my eyes.
• Driving up to perform a few songs on the radio. This was actually the very early morning, but I count it. I stayed up for something like 30 hours that day, not only setting a record for consecutive waking hours, but laughing harder than any other event that readily comes to mind.
  

The other day I enjoyed a delightful night drive. My employment took me to a neighboring state, and having early morning appointments the following day it was imperative I head home rather than booking a hotel. I listened to Radiohead and Coldplay the entire drive, songs like "How to Disappear Completely" and "Bigger Stronger." I had the windows down to enjoy the smell of cool night air. I saw several amazing shooting stars, the kind you could never hope for in the city. At one point my headlights fell on some creature hiding in the brush alongside the highway waiting for a chance to dart across and it's eyes were suddenly ablaze with some inward flame. I worked 16 hours that day, but contrary to expectations didn't feel at all sleepy. I was both invigorated and relaxed, and order was restored to life.

I need to take more night drives.

Led Zeppelin...

...has been my favorite band since about age 12. Sure I have other favorite bands that have topped them, but those first few years created a permanent place in my heart. The first cd I ever owned was their fourth album. I listened to it over and over and over again. I did the same with every other album they have. I have probably watched "The Song Remains the Same" more than any other movie, excepting "Cars" with Mogli. During my early teens I had a full blown obsession. I learned how to play guitar almost exclusively on Zeppelin songs. I used to could listen to all 26 minutes and 52 seconds of live "Dazed and Confused" without ever losing interest. I loved them, and nothing has ever quite been the same since.

My musical adventures have taken me far and wide over the years. Stone Temple Pilots, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Radiohead, Coldplay, Muse, and countless others. I purchased Radiohead's "OK Computer" and "Kid A" on the same day, and listened to them both so much you'd think I would have worn the cds right through. When I got "Parachutes" I literally listened to it repeatedly for a bare minimum of 3 hours a day every day for a month. "Absolution" simply blew me away with it's powerful riffs, haunting melodies, and astounding creativity.

It's been a very long time since I've felt that way about a new band. There have been plenty that I liked, and some that I really liked, but nothing that has really got me going. This music famine has got to end.

My Sister

Eva. She has inspired me on many occasions. It is to her I owe my first email address, and by extension my introduction to the joys of instant messaging. After reading her blog for several years I created my own. Her cassette tape of Weezer's Blue album was the first music I ever loved just because I loved it. On one long trip to see family in a distant town I "borrowed" it and sat in the rear facing back seat of the family station wagon listening through it's entirety, from side A to side B and back again. The experience shaped much of my later life. She it was who first dubbed me "Foo Foo," after the little bunny who hopped through the forest, bopping field mice on the head. That name was morphed over time into things like "Frugey," and "Foph," which I am occasionally called by other siblings to this day. In the midst of that nick name's great success she coined another, simpler one: "Boy." And thus I have been known for the past ten plus years. So much of my life in fact that it is as familiar as my own given name. Indeed, I would not be remotely the same person today were it not for Dear Sister's influence.

Thank you Sister.

The Hike

There is a lovely set of mountains near my home. They are one of the best kept secrets in the area, most people only think of the larger mountains across the valley. Mrs Candid was away tonight at a screening for the new Harry Potter movie she was lucky enough to acquire a seat in. That meant it was just Mogli and me. We considered several activities for our evening of fun. The water park, but his right arm is currently broken and casted. The playground, but we do that all the time. MarioKart, but I didn't really want to be in the house. And thus it was decided that we would go on a bear hunt. What a bear hunt it was!

The higher elevation was gloriously cool, the foliage wonderfully bright and green, the air delightfully fresh and clean. We embarked on a rather wide trail along the eastern slope, one that I've ventured down only a short way previously. Considering the width, it shouldn't have surprised me to find not one, not two, but five vehicles that had tried driving, only to slide off the edge and down various embankments and be abondoned with no hope of retrieval. Mogli was especially excited about this, finding it exceedingly amusing to toss rocks down on top of them. Well, one of them, the rest were too far for his feeble left handed pitches to reach.

After quite a trip for such a small hiker, much more than I expected from him, especially without him begging me to carry him, I finally told him we needed to go back so we didn't get stuck after the sun went to sleep and the wild animals got us. He wasn't impressed. He just kept going and saying "there's a waterfall this way, we have to find it!" Unable to stop him, I dained to follow a while, hoping he really would get tired of the journey and head for home. Imagine my surprise when we came over a rise and heard the sound of running water. This of course encouraged him and he sped forward, eventually reaching a place where the path, quite narrow by now, reached a small stream with several waterfalls. We dipped our sticks in the water and splashed rocks around for a few minutes before turning back at last. The entire way home he continually reminded me that he was right and I was wrong: "I tell you there was a waterfall! You tell me no, but I tell you!"




Now for the true highlight of the trip. Closer to the trailhead, but still far enough to feel quite distant, I heard the last words I ever wanted to hear in such a situation: "I need to go poop." I confess a moment of panic as I searched the surrounding forest in vain for a commode or outhouse of any condition or variety that I knew would not be found. In fact, even were we at the car already it would have been at least twenty minutes to the nearest, and that in the opposite direction from home. I forced myself to be calm and helped him find a spot off the trail where he could heed nature's call. He had been saying all afternoon that he wasn't wearing underwear because Grammy didn't change him out of his pullup after the afternoon nap. I foolishly assumed that meant he was still in said pullup. For a moment I even considered letting him go and dealing with it when we got home, but quickly realized that would make the homeward voyage quite miserable for the both of us, and the pullup likely wouldn't contain the mess so well anyway. Either way it turned out he was being quite literal when he said he wasn't wearing any underwears; he had apparently ditched the pullup sometime between spraying the kitchen floor with furniture polish so the house would smell good and sliding around on the freshly polished floor. To make the occasion a little extra special, we had had chimichangas for dinner. Chimichangas give Mogli diarrhea. No underwears. No toilet. And you guessed it, no toilet paper. I cleaned him up with leaves. Yes, leaves. Some parts of the trail had these great big plants with massive leaves. Enormous, wonderful leaves. This part of the trail had little tiny leaves.

It was one of the worste experiences of my life.

But on the way down the canyon we saw 5 deer!

Strawberry

Check this bad boy out:




That is one beastly strawberry. It must have come from some amazing strawberry fields. To find it's equal, one would likely have to search the strawberry fields forever.

I recently heard that the Beatles box set is supposed to come out this fall. As I understood it is to be all of their studio albums plus some other goodies. I love the Beatles, but don't actually own much of their music, and this will be the perfect chance to remedy that situation. Soon I will be basking in the aural pleasure of Beatle-mania like I've never basked before.

In the meantime, I'm going to enjoy that mighty, mighty berry.

Red Skelton

I remember as a lad watching old Red Skelton shows with my pops and laughing uncontrollably. They don't make comedians like they used to. This here is another side of Red. Comedy isn't the only thing that's degraded since the good ole days...

Song Of The Day

Today's song is "Underground" by Ben Folds Five. I made this particular selection because Mogli has been singing it continuously the last few days:





Need I say more?

Mad

I'm not the angry type. Although I recently made a list of pet peeves, it was really just for fun. Truth be told, the last time I remember really losing my temper was sometime during senior year when David Deppe tried to strangle me. Even then it lasted no more than a few seconds: it's David Deppe, what am I going to do, punch him? I suppose I was pretty irate at Zach Probst one time, when he disappeared. I had calmed down by the time he came back though. The point is, I'm not very extreme when it comes to temper. I take after my mother in that way. When it comes up she always conjures up some event when her rage was palpable and all in her presence quivered in fear, but we all know she's exaggerating. If you are fortunate enough to know my mother you are probably chuckling at the very thought, if not laughing aloud. Ours is a very chill family.

Today though, I'm just pissed right off.

Mogli Is Now This Many

Mogli is now this many:



Hard to believe, right? I can barely do it. He pretty much had the coolest birthday ever. While I was busy quitting my job to move on to a better one, his Mommy took him to the aquarium with a cousin. They saw sea horses and alligators and an octopus. Afterwards they headed to McDonalds, where I joined them and Mogli got a sweet Spider Man toy. After running home for a few minutes we headed over to the pool where he wore himself out quite thoroughly in his efforts to prove that he is not afraid of anything. His Batman party was also a success. He was delighted by all the attention, and the presents and cake too. Grandmas, Grandpas, aunts, uncles, and cousins came over and he took LOTS of pictures of soon-to-be-Aunt Melly. He went to bed happy, and went to sleep about the time his head hit the pillow. So did we.

Doctor

I remember watching Doogie Howser M.D. as a kid. I don't remember any specifics, except one time he was doing an autopsy on a mummy alone in a dark room and he thought it came to life. Or something like that. Last summer I was introduced to Dr Horrible, and it instantly became one of my favorite things ever. To be honest I didn't even realize that Neil Patrick Harris, who plays Dr Horrible, was also Dr Howser, until someone else mentioned it. The other day I stumbled on this and it made me think "Neil Patrick Harris is funny." To back that up, there is this, and while you're at it, all of this.

That's all for today.

Pets

In a recent job interview I was asked what my pet peeves are. I found myself quite unprepared for this inquiry, and kind of stumbled around while I thought of something that makes me mad. Truth be told, I'm not often angry, so it was a more difficult task than it sounds. Just to be sure I never run into that problem again, I've compiled a respectable list of things that tick me off. They are as follows:

• People who hold up the checkout line while they count and re-count their change, then try to stuff it into an already overstuffed wallet.
• When someone leaves their turn signal on for miles.
• Brightly colored leggings (except on wee little girls, then it's just funny).
• People I've known for long periods of time who forget my name.
• When people park in handicapped or no parking areas because they're "just running in really quick."
• Loud public cell phone talkers.
• Public breast feeding.
• People in the 20 Items Or Less lane with over 20 items.
• People who, upon hearing the name "Joe," insist on making the tired old "Joe Mama" joke.
• When someone pees on the seat.
• Poor usage of the English language.
• Published or otherwise professional writing, like school newspapers (Globe) or corporate memos, that fall under the last category. These count as double, and are what I eventually cited in the interview.
• Utah County drivers.
• Crooked mohawks.
• Straight or pegged leg jeans.
• People who insist there's something wrong with a product or service and they deserve a discount. (Excluding instances where there really is something wrong and the person goes about it in a polite way)
• Liars
• People who wear, for example, Led Zeppelin t-shirts, but don't really listen to Led Zeppelin.
• Boys who wear girl pants.
• People who mumble under their breath, only to get angry when they can't be understood and are asked to repeat their mumble.
• When someone enters a store with muddy shoes, having made no attempt to clean said shoes.
  
• People who try to talk on the phone and do something else... at the expense of the something else.

I could probably go on, but this will have to suffice for the time being. I'm all mad just thinking about all of it.

Conceited

SLCC Jazz Band had their first concert of the semester tonight. I am a part of said ensemble. We played several Miles Davis pieces, a few Jobim, Duke, Dizzy, and several others. Good times were had by all.

This semester I've had a difficult time finding my groove. As it's been a few years since I've really played I have lost my lip a great deal, and was pretty rusty in general. The result has been that I've been timid in my playing, my solos have been lack luster at best, and my arrogant self has been lost in some sort of haze.

Until tonight.

Something about being in front of an audience does wonders for me. Suddenly it didn't matter that the other trumpet player's range is half an octave higher than mine, or that most of the rhythm section are expert in the ways of chordal voicing and improvisation. The only important thing was that I was there and everyone got to listen to me play, just like it used to be.

That's right folks, ol' Cuppa Joe is back and cocky as ever.

Road Trip Blues

Meet Mogli:



He's a delight. Normally quite amiable and fun.

Normally.

Last week we took a short road trip to Ogden. Mind you, Mogli is potty training. Without consideration to the circumstances we allowed him two drinks shortly before we left. Everyone see where this is going?

Just at the on ramp he started yelling at the top of his lungs "I needs to go pee!!!" So the very next exit we were stopped at a gas station. Not ten minutes after getting back on the road the yells began again. And again. And again. One time we couldn't stop soon enough, and he peed just a little in his pants. Long story short, it took us easily twice as long to get to Ogden as it normally would, and he was stuck sitting in his own urine.

When we got there we ran into another convenience store. I was running as quick as I could, and as I frantically searched for the restroom, I felt my arm get warm and start dripping. Yep, I was peed on. The rest of the trip there were two urine soaked gentlemen.

Isn't parenthood fun?

The Visitor

We had just come home from the gym. A fire had broken out nearby, and a thick black cloud hung over the area. Unable to see what was burning, we came inside to get away from the cold, smoke filled air and blaring sirens. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary; the mess was just my homework still scattered on the floor around the desk. We were chatting about nothing in particular when it happened. My eyes were drawn to the movement, and the rush of adrenaline from the surprise surged through me...

Several hours later we cautiously walked back into the apartment. She had vacated almost immediately, while I stayed around waiting for the authorities. After they had come and gone I had joined her at Pike Place, attempting to reassure her that all was well. Now, as she stood apprehensively by the door, I quickly walked through every room to be sure we were alone. The maintenance crew had been given a priority work order to fix up the breach, but that wouldn't be done until tomorrow at the earliest, so the feeling of vulnerability was lingering, however hard I willed it away. I gave the all clear and she came all the way in, still glancing nervously into every corner...

All we can do now is wait. Hope that the sounds don't come back. Try to sleep through the night without letting it get into our heads. Pray that it's only us in here. And that it stays that way...

Miles

If that's not cool, nothing is.

Stick it to em Jason

Mr. Speaker, I rise to give voice to the need to cut the size and scope of government. While the rhetoric and calls for increased spending continue to escalate, let us also remember it is our duty and obligation to do more with less.

Over the past 12 years, annual Federal spending has more than doubled, exceeding $3.1 trillion. Since January 2007, our government has added an average of $2.8 billion per day to our national debt. If deficit spending were the way to prosperity, our economy would be booming.

We are more than $10 trillion in debt and there is no end in sight. Let us remember it is not the government's money we talk about and spend, it is the American people's money. And we cannot afford to continue to run this government on a credit card. We're going to have to do more with less, and that means finding ways to cut government spending.

-Rep Jason Chaffetz, Jan 13 2009 On the House floor, 111th Congress

Read more at http://chaffetz.house.gov/legis/index.shtml

Finally, a politician that gets it. Let's hope he stays strong.

The Mav

I am now your Adventure Guide. Come to me with all your convenience store adventure needs, and I will guide you.

A Little Flavor

Searching for a new job isn't fun. I know, I know, most people can think of nothing better than soliciting random managers and HR reps with "will work 4 $$" signs, but after a while it gets dull.











Okay! Okay! We all get the point! I'd rather hold signs in protest. Here are some examples:



















Now tape these bad boys to some sticks and we've got ourselves a picket line!

Chicken

I fried some chicken today. It was damn good chicken. My mashed potatoes turned out a bit too lumpy for my liking, but then I started writing a song.

It Starts...

Here I am.